Michael Douglas: Women gave me Throat Cancer

3 Jun

Note: This post contains adult themes and language.

If you are looking for the source of anything that is wrong in the world, or in your corner of the world, or in your workplace or home, look no further than the nearest woman.

It’s obviously her fault. Going all the way back to Eve, the original temptress; the one who got Adam in trouble by, you know, making him sin.

Just when I thought we might be making some progress on this ridiculous notion, actor Michael Douglas makes the incredible and unsupported by medical evidence claim that his throat cancer was caused, not by his years of heaving smoking and drinking, but by having frequent intimate associations with a certain part of the female anatomy. Really? Really!

Give me a break, man, um, MEN. I am so tired of everything that is wrong with the world, and with the male species, being blamed on women.

Women are so naturally tempting, especially when dressed certain ways, wearing their hair a certain way, or basically breathing, that men can’t help but lust. That’s just how men are, and it’s all the fault of women. Some churches believe the mere act of wearing pants is adulterous behavior in women, stating that women who wear pants deliberately cause men to lust and commit the sin of adultery.

Women are so weak, so incapable of maturely saying, “thanks but no thanks” to an ignorant or respectful advance, that we must not let men and women who are not married to one another be along in church settings. Because, see previous paragraph, women are so tempting, AND so weak, they can’t help but be exploited by men, who after all, are all about the pursuit and conquer, thanks to those little minxes, women.

It is not only men who perpetuate this stereotype of women being the source of what is wrong in the world. Women are often guilty of blaming other women. Take the woman, for example, who forgives her husband for marital infidelity, and blames it all on the other woman. How many women buy into the belief that they are responsible for being attractive, but not so attractive to cause lust in the hearts of men.  Because, there is just no way men could be responsible for their own lust, right?

Geeze, peeps; get a grip. How about some personal responsibility?

UPDATE:

Now he says he does NOT blame, you know, on his throat cancer after doctors questioned his “dubious claims.”

2 Responses to “Michael Douglas: Women gave me Throat Cancer”

  1. Greg Hahn June 3, 2013 at 1:25 pm #

    I agree with 99% of what you’re saying about the way women are treated in the church and the world, but this Michael Douglas issue seems rather vague to me. I don’t see it as anything anti-woman at all. He slept around and got an STD. That’s why (he says) he has throat cancer.

    Maybe he blames women in general. Or maybe not. How can you tell?

    • damannwrite June 3, 2013 at 2:51 pm #

      Hi Greg. I can see that you might see it as a stretch, or too vague. I happen to see it as yet another example of the female sexual temptress causing the downfall of a man. Instead of taking responsibility for activities such as excessive drinking / smoking, it is easier to blame the temptress.

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